Monday, June 22, 2009

BIG NEWS about Samantha

OK, that was just to get you to read this. Samantha is almost 5 weeks old and is doing TERRIFIC. If she would sleep through the night, we would have the perfect baby.

So Chris and I had to work out a schedule for getting up with baby since I have work. The schedule we came up with is that on Sunday through Thursday nights, she wakes up with Samantha from 9:30 PM to 4:30 AM. I get up with her from 4:30 AM to 7:30 AM, after which I go to work. On Friday and Saturday, I get the long haul. So far it’s worked, though it’s meaning Chris has to sleep on the chair most of the night since Samantha only seems to like to sleep if she’s being held.

She is wonderful… but soooo needy.

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After i got home from work today, I fed Samantha. After which I decided it would be a good idea for her to taste her first few granules of sugar… and blechhhhh! She barfed all over me. Now, a few weeks ago this would have grossed me out. But I have gained a immunity to baby barf and poop. It makes me think about what a putz Andrea Yates’s husband really was (she’s the mom that drowned her kids a few years back.) Apparently the guy NEVER had changed a diaper. I was a little scared since I had never done it either, but it’s soooo overrated. At least so far.

My Baby, a poem.

Baby, the first time I saw you

The doctor was cutting mommy open with a scalpel.

The little bits of hamburger on his hand but a hint of what to come.

"Those aren't baby kicks!" the doctor shouted above the din "It's a cauturizing device giving you shocks to move your muscles!"

The physician brought out the crowbar, and I felt a surge, knowing you would soon be in my arms.

Crying, they pulled you out into the bright cold world, purple face, blue hands, and body dripping the lifeblood of the mother.

And now I spend each day with you. And feel your soft skin.

And smell your curdled poop.

SLEEP BABY! DAMN IT, SLEEP!

4 comments:

  1. You're so funny. I hope she sleeps for you. Preferably in the crib. I had a bad sleeper myself. He finally slept through the night at 9 months old. But I'm sure that won't happen to you.

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  2. Oh, Kevin! It is hard to function after weeks of sleepless nights. But this, too, shall pass. :) What a cutie, though!

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  3. Kevin - a) that was the most disgusting poem ever. b) i don't care how much or little sleep you've gotten, now I have to have my fourth c-section and will keep picturing hamburger on my doctor's hands. c) i am very mad at you. d) get dr. weissbluth's sleep book - you and your wife will be changed people. i promise. d) babywise too. these are the only two sleep books you will EVER need. btw - hurry and get them b/c 6 weeks old is their turning point. e) why did it take you so long to post about your new baby? f) it is 4:30 am and i'm hoping you're reading this at the same time.

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  4. You.are.hysterical.

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