Pacifier

I tried sucking on one of Samantha’s pacifiers the other day to see what was so great about it.  It was strangely comforting.  Do they make an adult size?

BIG NEWS about Samantha

OK, that was just to get you to read this. Samantha is almost 5 weeks old and is doing TERRIFIC. If she would sleep through the night, we would have the perfect baby.

So Chris and I had to work out a schedule for getting up with baby since I have work. The schedule we came up with is that on Sunday through Thursday nights, she wakes up with Samantha from 9:30 PM to 4:30 AM. I get up with her from 4:30 AM to 7:30 AM, after which I go to work. On Friday and Saturday, I get the long haul. So far it’s worked, though it’s meaning Chris has to sleep on the chair most of the night since Samantha only seems to like to sleep if she’s being held.

She is wonderful… but soooo needy.

After i got home from work today, I fed Samantha. After which I decided it would be a good idea for her to taste her first few granules of sugar… and blechhhhh! She barfed all over me. Now, a few weeks ago this would have grossed me out. But I have gained a immunity to baby barf and poop. It makes me think about what a putz Andrea Yates’s husband really was (she’s the mom that drowned her kids a few years back.) Apparently the guy NEVER had changed a diaper. I was a little scared since I had never done it either, but it’s soooo overrated. At least so far.

My Baby, a poem.

Baby, the first time I saw you

The doctor was cutting mommy open with a scalpel.

The little bits of hamburger on his hand but a hint of what to come.

"Those aren't baby kicks!" the doctor shouted above the din "It's a cauturizing device giving you shocks to move your muscles!"

The physician brought out the crowbar, and I felt a surge, knowing you would soon be in my arms.

Crying, they pulled you out into the bright cold world, purple face, blue hands, and body dripping the lifeblood of the mother.

And now I spend each day with you. And feel your soft skin.

And smell your curdled poop.

SLEEP BABY! DAMN IT, SLEEP!

Labor: Hour 35

Chris's water broke at 3:30 AM yesterday, and it's been really slow progress. I'll let you know the full story later. It's not amusing, but baby is safe and that's what's really important.
As the mothers who birthed in hospitals know, you're only supposed to have clear fluids. We've sneaked in Animal Crackers, ginger snaps and Goldfish. But we also take advantage of their popsicles and jello.

Actually, imitation jello :)

It's a gel-type dessert!

I am a god

I'm not THE God. At least I don't think.

So there I was... in the 1st floor kitchen, looking to buy a Snicker's bar. My floor, the 3rd floor, was out. The 2nd floor would only accept correct change. Thus I end up in the 1st floor kitchen.

The Snicker's in the machine cost 80 cents. I put in 4 quarters and press '1' '4' '6' to dispense a Snicker's bar. And pop! One comes out. I think to myself, "wouldn't it be cool if ANOTHER one came out?" knowing that the vending machines here will spit out another item if it senses that nothing fell to you. Well, keep in mind the first bar fell just fine. I hear 2 clinks... my change. Then POP! Another one comes out! Clink! MORE change!

I got 2 Snicker's bars and 55 cents change. Things like this don't just happen. This is miraculous.

Could one of the Snicker's have a visage of the Virgin Mary on it? We shall find out.

Baby Samantha's 32 week report

Samantha had her 32 week ultrasound yesterday, and passed with flying colors. Chris isn't taking the protein-enhanced shakes anymore, so baby appears to be growing just fine on her own. I expect things growth wise to be smooth sailing from here on out. Unfortunately, Chris is starting to get very uncomfortable. She's used to being able to do things like bend over, and I think she didn't miss having cramps. They're not bad, but they're there now. We thought they were Braxton-Hicks, but the doctor says no. However, the doctor also isn't concerned that she's having the cramps because they're not consistent.

We've made progress on the house :)

In the last week, here's some what we (well, mostly Chris) have done:

• Primed and painted the nursery
• Cleaned out the cupboards
• Carpets cleaned
• Rotted siding replaced
• Furnace filter changed
• Furnace serviced
• Bought a new sink and faucet

Geekin' out

I was a GM at a Dungeons and Dragons Game Day event on March 21st. Little did I know I would become famous...

Check me out! Look at that head of hair. You can see a hot babe sitting to my left, mostly blocked by the guy in the yellow shirt. That's Chris.

And for you, a signed picture of myself

I love politicians making buffoons of themselves. Check out http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/toby_harnden/blog/2009/04/01/barack_obamas_gift_for_the_queen_an_ipod_your_majesty.

So so far we've given England

• DVDs that don't play in their DVD players.
• An iPod.

And we got

• A SIGNED PICTURE of the queen and her husband. WOW!

What do we pay these people for again?